Oh, My Lucky Stars;The New Zodiac By: Money Penney

 I woke up yesterday morning as a crabby, emotional, nurturing Cancer, born July 1, and I went to bed, upon further investigation as a somewhat more fitting Gemini. Bond and I were about to retire after watching most of the third installment of Nation Treasure when he asked me if my sign had changed.

"What now?" I said.

"Are you still a Cancer?" He replied. I thought he was telling me a knock knock joke or a chicken crossed the road joke.

Like maybe, "Why did the Cancer cross the road?" 

"Why?"

"Because she was too far away from home and had to bake cupcakes and watch the Lifetime Channel and complain."

Or-

"Knock Knock."

"Who's there?"

"Cancer."

"Cancer who?"

"Cancer lend me some tissues? I can't stop whining."

I obviously just made those up, and rather pointedly because I spent my whole life under the false premise that the traits of a Cancer were my cross to bear.  Which in and of itself is a very Cancerian thing to do (see Cancers & martyrdom).

 

 

"So, now that you know I'm not 'punking' you, are you still a Cancer? I'm still an Aquarius."

A brief panic filled my heart. Exactly like the feeling you get when you find out that there is no such thing as Santa Claus. It was ridiculous that I was upset because I had come to terms with the negative quality traits associated with my sign and learned to make excuses for them and my own behavior, but now I was forced to have an instant personality overhaul and the wort part was that I knew squat about Gemini's. Was it an astrological upgrade? Was I instantly going to adopt a more stable outlook as I checked my bags onto a First-Class flight of fancy?

"Actually, I'm a Gemini now..."

Bond erupted with laughter, and saw my disconcerted gaze.  He did what he always does when he sees that I am displeased, he makes it better.

"Just listen to this..." He read aloud from his IPhone screen the compatibility between Aquarius and Gemini which was a perfect match, followed by the breakdown of Aquarius and Cancer.
The latter being a venomous and tumultuous match.  I was sold.  I felt like I was finally able to live freely from the mocking comments about my otherwise Eeyore-like disposition.

But how did this all come about? Very simply explained, the pull on the Earth by the moon had skewed the alignment of the stars to the earth.  We were basically using the equivalent of a hand drawn map to that of which is to scale. The map that the gas station attendant draws on a scrap of paper isn't wrong, its just not accurate.  So, now we are being asked to reintroduce the Star Sign Ophiuchus that had been in the original ancient Babylonian star chart, but someone along the way deemed inaccurate.
Next thing you know, we will find out that the Earth, indeed, is actually flat.

These are the new signs, prepare yourself for an identity crisis, but just think, you may like your self better in the end.

• Capricorn: January 20 - February 16
  
• Aquarius: February 16 - March 11
  
• Pisces: March 11 - April 18
  
• Aries: April 18 - May 13
  
• Taurus: May 13 - June 21
  
• Gemini: June 21 - July 20
  
• Cancer: July 20 - August 10
  
• Leo: August 10 - September 16
  
• Virgo: September 16 - October 30
  
• Libra: October 30 - November 23
  
• Scorpio: November 23 - November 29
  
• Ophiuchus: November 29 - December 17
  
• Sagittarius: December 17 - January 20

Veg Out-In Maui Hawaii!! By: Octopussy

Octopussy here! Reporting live from the hot and heavy island of Maui, where the Second Chakra lives and breathes through the somewhat unsuspecting inhabitants of this lush and wonderfully diverse Island of Delights.

What can I say?, wind sufing for the morning, hiking a waterfall midday, and backyard organic gardening for sunset, followed by stargazing upcountry Kula, you can do it all in one day here...but what's the fun in that?

Yes, for the hit in a run crowd, this island is heaven. 

So, in an effort to pack in the most of the day, while learning about organic gardening on basically an inactive volcano smack dab in the middle of the pacific ocean, I sent my dolphin boy lover in search of food for lunch. we decided on Veg Out in Haiku, a small town located in the North shore of Maui nestled in the parking lot with the post office, a creative second hand store, a small gym, and Money Penny's favorite side swig passion, Maui Kombucha (to be reviewed another time when I'm ready to get back on that band wagon).

Veg Out is a counter order sit down simple yet wondiferously yummie food joint that is a love of the locals. A predominently hippie town, we got our fair share of veggie types, and Veg Out serves an array of special choices for the discerning Brocco Head. The Vegan Pizza with nutritional yeast sprinkled on top is mouth wateringly satisfying. The various salads, incredibly priced, and overflowing with green abundance are only made more satisfying by there incredible home made dressings...Cilantro Tahini yummmE.

Most food is locally grown, and way fresh. WE had the Avocado Wrap with Falafel added, and it kept us going for at least 4 hours after the joyous consumption....

Yay Veg Out...see you when we have a Pad Thai craving soon....and for my kind of liquid lunch, they also serve smoothies...

Come to Maui!

Aloha...

Cartelli’s Bar & Grill: Where Sushi Meets The Tuscan Sun By: Money Penney

I thought Bond was playing a trick on me last night when I saw a sushi menu peeking out from the center of the menu at the very packed "Cartelli's" in Dover New Hampshire. Bond just shook his head, but I asked our lovely waitress to please confirm that it was neither trick nor illusion, this very Italian restaurant boasts a sushi bar.  I was very confused about how to work one of the hand rolls into the meal seamlessly as an appetizer and then concentrate on a more traditional garlicky Italian entree. 


I wondered if it might be more palatable to choose one of the bento box dinners that the chef had prix fixe on the menu than try to blubber around in mixing these two cuisines.  The Dinner Box, served with miso soup, seaweed salad, shrimp shumai and a summer roll with a  choice of 2: A. Shrimp and vegetable tempura B. Sashimi salmon, white fish, shrimp and salmon. C. Sushi tuna, white fish, shrimp and salmon. D.California roll. E. Vegetable roll — $18.00, looked quite satisfying.  But when Bond ordered the fried calamari I knew to trust my gut, and my gut wanted Italian. 


Although the calamari was fried to perfection it did have a twist.  I knew that the chef was definitely a non-conformist.  The marinara for dipping that I was expecting was replaced with a ramekin of Cajun mayo and a cocktail sauce.  I gave up my preconceived notions about what our dinner was going to taste like.  I didn't know what to expect, and it felt kinda good.   


Bond and I met eyes across the table and he said,"I think you should have this one." as he nudged a very leggy calamari towards my side of the dish.  That calamari had legs built for runways in Milan. 


"No, baby. Um, thanks, I think you can have that one." I said with a smile knowing that there was no way for me to eat something with legs that long with out a feeling that I was pulling on the strings of my cave-woman primal urges. The supermodel calamari was left alone on the plate when we had our fill. 


As the dish was picked up from the edge of the table and we enjoyed our drinks of choice; Bond had his usual Jim Beam and Coke with a lime, and me a Vodka Soda splash of Cran with a lime, we realized that the line for a table was almost out the door.  


"We got here just in time!" Bond stated with relief. It was only seven o'clock but there was standing room only, and a solo guitarist was setting up to croon the audience with a lovely mix of music.  


The dimly lit setting was perfect.  A votive candle on our table drew attention to a rather extensive wine list, and kept the unused salt and pepper shakers company as the food did not need their accompaniment.  


A bread and salad course came and went. The sage infused fresh half-loaf was paired with olive oil, balsalmic reduction and roasted garlic for dipping. I ordered the salad off of the japanese menu, my only complaint not against the restaurant but to the fact that Bonds traditional garden salad had an amazing mustard vinagerette, that I would have rather chosen in retrospect.


Bonds medium Rib Eye (21.99) floated down before him garnished with a garlic brandy cream, and sat between crisp halved zucchini coins, and a generous portion of mashed potato.  My mussels fra diavlo ($11.99) topped with crusty buttered flatbread triangles was so generous a portion that I could not get through the first layer before I was officially full.  I asked for lemon wedges and dug in, but after a few to many sandy bites and Bond explaining that I shouldn't chew the mussels to the point where if there was residual sand in them that I would get a mouthful, I admitted that I was just plain full. 


The meal was perfectly timed and any server that walked by bussed our table or made sure we had everything we needed.  Our waitress was not rushed at all even though the place was obviously busy. Bond and I freed up our table courteously so that others may have a chance to fill their bellies, and we left all smiles, and our breath was equally as garlicky as the other so luckily it cancelled itself out.

Japanese Salad

Rib Eye

Mussels

One Cool Thing By: Money Penney

I love setting a tranquil mood when I'm in the house, but sometimes lighting candles isn't enough.  And who has time to bake an apple pie so that the scent can permeate your living space with a warm cozy calm?

But we all have time to press play on the DVD player. "Screenscapes" is a collection of discs that turn your TV into a mood enhancing machine.  You can go about your at-home chores and glance over at a the view of swimming fish in depths below the tide, a beach-scape that will warm you up in the dead of January, a view of Earth from Mars.

Set up a screen saver of roses while you burn a scented floral candle (perfect for Valentines Day and for those of you who are less conventional... watch a slithering snake terrarium, no mice required. 

Kombucha-It's Not Just For Hippies By: Money Penney

After a very long night in New York City a few years ago a friend picked my very hung-over self from the train station near my home.  It was three in the afternoon but I couldn't shake those dehydration inspired, alcohol induced brain melting feelings that can only be likened to that of a hangover.

My friend saw the desperate look in my tired eyes, only slightly veiled by the rim of a "Top Gun" hat that I had "borrowed" from the top of an acquaintance's head that morning in an attempt to seem a bit less conspicuous, as the ensemble that I was still donning from the previous night's acts of reckless alcohol consumption and abandonment, seemed uncharacteristic for the time of day that I was wandering ill-kempt and probably reeking like a sailor lost at sea, through the underground maze that is the subway system.

As my friend gazed upon my state of obvious misery and cold-sweats, I complained that I was so dehydrated that I had the resulting symptoms of a UTI, she knew she needed to help.

"It smells bad, but just drink it down." My dear friend stated knowingly and selflessly as she handed me from her car's cup holder a glass bottle of seaweed green colored liquid with chunks of solid settlement and strands of culture from fermentation.  I nearly gagged at the sight, but the pretty label had me assume that what ever she had in that bottle was not what the label was advertising.

"What in the hell is that!?" I asked looking as green as the algae steeped contents of the bottle still in her hand hovering over the center console.

"It's Kombucha! Its from the health food store. You defiled your insides last night, obviously, as I can glean by the looks of you and that ridiculous hat, when did they make a "Top Gun" hat with a glitter plastic logo anyway? Now, this stuff is fermented tea, and there's Spirulina in here, that's a blue green algae..."

"You don't say..."I facetiously mocked her explanation of the daunting darkly tinted opaque swamp water.

She rolled her eyes at me and loosened the cap to expose a hissing sound and sudden eruption of foam and natural effervescence to nearly spill over the mouth of the thick glass container, and almost poured it down my throat in a motherly nurturing know-it-all sort of way.

Now, I'm not saying that it cured me, but I did immediately feel a feeling I can only describe as giddy.  The flavor was not unlike a watered down sweetened apple cider vinegar, and the texture that the culture and Spiralina powder created was not distracting me from my ability to be pleasantly surprised by this magical potion. I was hooked!!!

For those of you who want to re-balance your body's chemistry whether it be due to a self-inflicted hang-over, or years of eating fast and processed food, or hey- the stuff has even helped in the battle against cancer, although not approved by the FDA as a cure, mind you, you can make it yourself, if you can wait a month or so for fermentation. Although I plan on learning the intensive brewing process, I know that if I had the wherewithal to have it ready, I would also have the wherewithal to not get into a bind wherein I have to take recuperative measures.

Read more on Wikipedia to enlighten yourself even more about what exactly Kombucha is:Click here for knowledge:)